Woke up at 5am this morn, having bad dreams again. I hate bad or depressing dreams, don't mind the crazy ones  so much, that don't make sense . When I have bad dreams I don't want to return to sleep fraid of returning to the same dream, so I usually just lay there awake for awhile but this morn after 1hr , I got up and came to my man cave with a cup of black coffee and ck'd  facebook then played world of tanks on xbox. Sneaking around the house as not to wake anyone for there is no reason why they shouldn't  stay asleep . I hate it when I am sleeping and someone is up and thinks everyone should be or they just don't care about being quiet cause you are asleep. Now I'm writing this just to share with whoever may care for whatever reason.
 I really like having heart to heart talks with someone who I can trust to open up to. It's best when they open up to me also or it seems all one sided and you start thinking am I saying to much? Do they care about what I am saying or being bored by it or really don't want to hear it and are just being polite? I really like getting to know the inside working of people and what they think. Most times it differs from me but that's ok, I try to understand from their point of view why they think like they do and not like I do and I try to get them to see it from my perspective also.It also helps me to try and be a better person and friend to them. Especially family members. Most times I overthink things and don't let it go like I should I am told. I guess I have a problem there as it's hard to stop thinking for me. Ahh, the coffee is good , my recliner is comfortable and I look forward to what this day may bring my way.

Memories and memory. This weekend it really hit home that our memory is really strange at times. I don't remember a thing about what someone else told me when we were talking. I mean it was in our life together , I was there according to them and I believe them, I just don't remember it, or do I vaguely after hearing about it. Kinda like when waking from a dream was it real or a dream?  Then talking to someone else about what I thought was a big moment in their life, they don't remember anything about that! I have carried this memory with me for years and remember the episode of life clearly and thought it meant so much to them and come to find out it must not have meant anything or they would remember. Funny how we remember things and don't. Some things that mean a lot really only mean a lot to ourselves, and some things that mean a lot to others mean nothing to us. So does this make it harder or easier to make a mark in someone's life, to know you matter to them, to know they will remember you and why?